Toddlers And Coping With Loss
Helping your child come to terms with loss is very difficult. Apart from having to explain to them you are dealing with your own pain as well. Young toddlers will not understand death, but will obviously miss the person (or pet) that is missing from their lives.
Older toddlers will comprehend more, but the concept of never seeing someone again, at that age is very difficult to grasp.
How can I help my toddler understand and grieve?
- If a relative has a terminal illness be honest and say that the doctors can’t make them better.
- Be truthful about death. Death is permanent and toddlers need to understand this. Lying to them (in good faith) will make death seem scarier. For example if you say Granny has “gone away” then next time you pop out without them, they may think your not coming back like Granny. Or if you say someone fell asleep, then they could feel terrified of sleeping.
- Take your child to the funeral if you think they can cope with it. It will give them a chance to say goodbye.
- It’s ok for your child to see people crying, but hysterical sobbing and wailing will frighten them, steer them away from this.
- Maybe you could plant a rose or another flower of their choice in memory of that person.
- Talk about the person (or pet). Recall happy memories or funny stories involving that person. Make the child comfortable talking about them.
- Be honest with them that you feel sad too.
- Lots of hugs and cuddles can help both of you.
